Pondering

As I sit here at my parents house with my daughter in the swing, I am thinking. I know I haven't really been writing lately and I wonder why. I have honestly stepped back from some of my baby loss groups. I think that I wanted some time away from my loss. My Anthony is always with me and always will be but I was starting to feel as though I was missing out on my life because my depression was starting to consume me. And I didn't want that. Yes I want my daughter to know of her twin but I don't want her to think that it is a sad thing. Yes it is sad but I want her to be happy she has a twin brother watching over her from heaven. I know my husband thinks I'm insane missing something we barely had so much but he was my baby. I'll always miss him and love him. Momma misses you baby boy.Visit me in my dreams so momma can rock you and hold you.